7a Maybe there is nothing really special about me at all. Maybe my childhood was just an ordinary sort of dysfunctional. Maybe my desire for a grand life is just delusional. Maybe people won’t remember my name at all, as I have no important contribution to make after all. The realization is deflating.
But what if I don’t want to stop living my epic adventure?! What if I don’t care that nobody knows it but me? I can be great, whether it is recognized by anyone else at all. I can be a legend in my own mind. Is there any harm in that?
I am interested in learning cycles – the lunar phases, my feminine cycle, seasons, etc. Tonight is the full moon – what does that mean?
I was falling asleep at 8p last night. I managed to pull myself up from the table at 9 and get myself into bed. I slept until 6a.
I want to live this time alone at home as though I were out camping. Mercury is in retrograde for another week, so I will continue the introspection. I’d like to come out of this period with a clear picture of where I am going and a beginning plan for how to get there. Am I to be a medical astrologer? An astrology midwife that helps people re-birth themselves? Where will I get my training? Do I really want this?