My fresh start is in jeopardy

October 12, 2016 ~ Wednesday

8a A lot has happened so far in the month of October. I arrived in Woodinville with a plan-ish. Spend some time with Edward. Spend some time with Susie and Tom, helping with the annual wine party. Prepare for my cross-country jaunt. Prepare to say goodbye for a spell.

Then I drank and we fought hard and I ended up dazed and confused for a full week – concussion. I drank all week during the recovery, and I am pretty sure I have liver issues now.

I behaved more like my old self at the wine party, telling my old stories like when I was running the winery business.

My belief in this trip to Florida is waning. My conviction of a fresh start as well. I actually started entertaining the idea of project work for Patit Creek again! What kind of crazy am I???

Now it feels crazy to take the trip. What kind of sane person does this? My creativity and good fortune reside with my rebel archetype, so why not just go for it?! Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead.

Why would I not allow myself this amazing gift? Is the professional me really worth more than this journey? What do I care what other people think? What do I care if this is crazy? What do I care about starting over with next to nothing? This could be the epic adventure of my life – pass or fail. Why deny myself?

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